Posted on September 17, 2007. Filed under: Uncategorized |

today was amazing! it was so freaking beautiful outside (and so was yesterday). it just gives you that feeling where you are happy to be living, and just being here. and it makes you want to just praise God for life and for everything. just to be alive, and to live every moment to the fullest, loving everyone. that’s totally how I’ve been feeling. and autumn of course is the best season, so I always get excited for it. especially since it means christmas is coming kinda soon.

so anyways, I’ve been wanting to blog for several days (since 2 a.m. sunday morning when I couldn’t fall asleep in the 2 hours before I had to get up for elevation) but now I’m finally getting around to it as I listen to anathallo. and I’ve been thinking a lot, so it may be kinda long and random.

now I’ve been sitting here blankly for the past 15 minutes trying to figure out what I was actually was going to post 2 nights ago ahaha. but I think I remember now. anyways,  some things have been going on in life lately, not with me personally, but with decisions that those close to me have been making, which end up effecting me in some way.

just having to watch someone close to you make a wrong, life altering decision, when they they know the right thing to do and just don’t do it, is just so hard to watch. especially when you have tried everything to remind them of what they know and all there is left to do is pray.

sometimes I wonder though if that’s how God sometimes feels about us. we know what we need to do. but do we always do it?

and then I started thinking about pastor’s message yesterday. the people we choose to be around (yeah, our entourage) does really define us. because we will eventually be like them, even if we don’t realize it.

“to be honest with you…” I think it’s so interesting when people say that. as if what they were saying before wasn’t honest? ahaha. anyways, but where I am going with this, is that we should always have that mindset of complete honesty and vulnerability. especially with those in our “small group” or entourage.

so many times I have seen people that aren’t totally honest about their struggles and brokeness, afraid that they won’t be accepted if people see who they really are. but that’s not how it should be. how else can we encourage and help others if we don’t really know the real them?

it’s all part of this trend that I’ve been thinking of and posting about lately. to get completely out of ourselves. after finally realizing that concept, it totally changed my life. that this life is not about me and what I need. but it’s about others. and making an impact. to get away from our hopes and dreams, and chase the dreams of God.

that our heart will beat with every beat of His heart and break with the things that break His. that we will be so far from ourslves that we are truly able to see things from a different perspective.

these lyrics are so freaking incredible. from phil wickham’s song “after your heart”

Can I have your attention?
What are we starting here?
Just look around you, the answer is clear
Listen, listen and hear the coming sound
All of the children are singing it loud

Let’s be the revolution
That lives to hold nothing back, nothing back

We’re after your heart, after your heart
All the walls are now breaking apart
Live like we see it, love like we mean it
This is the start, we’re after your heart

Start the ascension, begin the holy climb
Up to where heaven and earth collide
Bring your affection
All that you have inside
Enter the kingdom and become alive

Love with no condition
It lives for holding nothing back, nothing back

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